“I just don’t love him anymore.”
“We’ve grown too far apart.”
“Our marriage was a mistake.”
“I want a divorce.”

Earth-shattering statements I’ve heard and seen a thousand times. Personally, I call “bull-shit” on all of them. You don’t just wake up one morning deciding that you don’t love the person you promised to share the rest of your life with anymore. You don’t just fall out of love one evening as easily as you returned a broken purchase to the store.

Life happens and shit goes wrong in relationships all the time. It doesn’t mean you can just throw in the towel because it’s the easier option than actually putting some work into making the wrongs right.

Just on a side note: If your husband or wife beats the crap out of you. By all means, kick their ass to the curb. I’m talking about marriages where two people drift apart so much they end up questioning why they even got married in the first place.

Life has evolved to such a degree that instead of fixing things, we would rather discard them and just “get a new one”. When getting married people tend to tell you about all the nice and good things you’re going to experience. What they forget to mention is how hard it really is. Marriage is no walk in the park. Sometimes you look into the eyes of the person you said your “I do’s” to and you feel like throwing an angry cat on them, maybe that’s just me. Not that I would act upon any thoughts like that, just in case you were wondering. But then you calm down and you try to work things out and life goes on. No one tells you about the frustration that comes with the “package deal” of being married or in a serious committed relationship.

Maybe you are reading this and thinking that you have no idea what I’m talking about. Good on you then, you’re the lucky one in a million that has the movie romance that doesn’t exist. *thumbs up*

Reality is:

Life is messy and “all over the place”.
Relationships pushes buttons you never thought you had.
And love is incredibly bonkers wonkers!

Love isn’t moonshine and roses.
No, love isn’t chocolates and champagne dinners.
Love is absolutely CRAZY!

But it’s also CRAZily AMAZING!

I would take the crappy fights and “pull out my hair” moments any day if it means I get to experience the awarding moments that come with it all. Everything that is worth it, is harder than you ever thought possible. Including marriage. I’m not saying that you will be able to sort out all your problems in “one go” or even on your own. But don’t ever give up on something amazing, because it’s not every day you’re going to meet the love of your life. Moments like those only come once in a lifetime.

Maybe you’ve had a previous divorce, no judgement on my part. Just take the new chance you’ve gotten and make the best of every day you have together. If you’ve got problems that seem too big to solve; take a day or a week and think about it, work together to find a solution. If need be, go see a counsellor, those guys/gals aren’t half as bad as some people make them out to be. Just don’t make any rash decisions you’re going to end up regretting.

Don’t give up on someone just because hardship comes knocking. When working on your relationship and your marriage you’re investing more than money or gold. You’re investing in understanding, love, patience, kindness and so much more. You’re investing good things that will help build a strong foundation. And we all know that a strong foundation doesn’t give in when storms hit.

That’s all for now.